when is it ok to give meds...
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1562347/
Depression
http://adam.about.com/reports/000008_5.htm
ProHealth
http://www.prohealth.com/library/showarticle.cfm?libid=14713
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Sunday, November 14, 2010
What Am I Thankfuk For ?
This took me a lot to think about. After I sat down and thought about it I came up with a couple of things. Even though I have a very big family, I only speak to a few of them. The ones that I speak to, I am thankful for. They do get on my nerves but everyone isn’t perfect. I am also thankful for my boyfriend. It took me 3 years to realize he’s perfect to me. The whole time I just kept looking past him, he still waited for me though. I am thankful for that, he treats me wonderful. I am thankful for my health. I am thankful for the roof over my head because a lot of people are losing their houses every day. I am thankful for the food I receive every day, a lot of people are starving out there. I am thankful for school because without an education I am not be able to get far in this world.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Happiness and Relationships Part 2
Everyone always wants to feel as though they are worth something. No one wants to feel as though they are nothing. It is the sense of feeling validated or wanted; anything just to make them feel good. This also applies when it comes to relationships. Emotions and knowing yourself play a big role in the positive effects in relationships. In a relationship there is the process of personal validation to accepting and knowing one another. Everyone goes through it so there is no need to feel bad. Have you ever been with someone because they made you look good or made you feel more as a person than you thought you were? This is the process call validation. It is when you are with them because they make you feel like a lot more, they make you feel great. Everyone goes through this; this is how you meet people. You do not be with them because you know them so well, how can you know them so well if you just met them 5 minutes ago? Knowing and accepting someone takes time, it is not just one of those things that just come naturally. There is no possible way to speed up the transition in a relationship from seeking personal validation to knowing and appreciating one another.
So many people have a negative outlook on everything they do. I have never once seen someone genuinely happy with what they do or who they are with. They usually grow to like what they are doing or who they are with over time. It seems as like they force themselves to like it. These people tend to be less happy with everything even their relationships. I recently watched a video in class about emotions. In the video, Tony Robbins mentioned that emotions are the root behind everything you do. He stated that if you can change the emotion behind what you are doing then maybe you will be happier. For example, when you see a 10 page paper you have to do for class and your first emotion is angry then you would wind up being angry while doing it, therefore leading you to be less happy. If you can convince yourself that the essay is not that bad to begin with and change your emotion into excitement then you would be better off doing it. You would be happier. Can you apply this same idea when it comes to relationships? If you can put forth good emotions when it comes to being in a relationship then the outcome will probably be good. The both of you may grow as a whole if you begin to think positive instead of negative and bring forth good emotions instead of bad ones. In order to do any of this you must know yourself first.
Do you know what makes you happy and what makes you angry? The things you like to do and the things you cannot stand to do? This is all about knowing your core self. In the book Happier by Tal Ben-Shahar, he speaks about the core self. Ben-Shahar breaks down the many things that differ in relationships. He also speaks about core self. Core self basically talks about knowing yourself. You have to know what makes you the person you are today and the things you like to do. You have to know the things that you hate doing or the things that you would not mind trying. In order for anyone else to accept the things you like or the things you do not, you have to know them yourself first. This is all about your core self. How can someone else accept the things you like if you do not even know what they are? This process might take some time because people do not wake up in one day just knowing themselves; they have to try new things first. You never know what you like until you try it. After you know what you like and you do not like then you can work on being in a good relationship. You and your partner can both move on to the knowing and accepting part of the relationship.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought that they would be a good match for you but you never really knew them, they were just someone you thought would look good with you? When they go out with you they tell you that you are beautiful every day and boost your ego? This is called feeling validated. It really just means that they make you feel good or confident; it can be a whole bunch of reasons, you never really know them. Everyone usually goes through this so there is no reason to feel bad or ashamed. There is no way of speeding up the transition from validation to knowing and appreciating one another. This is a slow and steady thing. You just don’t walk up to a person and say “even though I only known you five minutes, I complete know and appreciate you” things don’t usually work out that way. In the happier written by Tal Ben-Shahar he quoted that Schnarch said that to cultivate genuine intimacy the focus of the relationship must shift from the desire to be validated ( seeking approval and praise) to the desire to be known. Schnarch also says in order for a relationship to grow both partners must be willing to be known, that means sharing their “core selves” , their fears , desires , etc. The relationship would mean so much more to you both if you are willing to be known instead of being validated. You both will have a happier relationship if you get over being validated and work on being known. This process takes time but it is all for the better.
Even though people always go through the validation process to transitioning to the knowing and appreciating one other it doesn’t mean you stay at feeling validated. Things will work out better if you just let yourself be known. You both can then start appreciating one another more than you thought you would. This will make your relationship better and you much happier. Yes, feeling validated is a great feeling but an even better is when you have someone that knows and appreciates you; they accept you for who you are. Trust me, I know the feeling and the feeling is wonderful.
So many people have a negative outlook on everything they do. I have never once seen someone genuinely happy with what they do or who they are with. They usually grow to like what they are doing or who they are with over time. It seems as like they force themselves to like it. These people tend to be less happy with everything even their relationships. I recently watched a video in class about emotions. In the video, Tony Robbins mentioned that emotions are the root behind everything you do. He stated that if you can change the emotion behind what you are doing then maybe you will be happier. For example, when you see a 10 page paper you have to do for class and your first emotion is angry then you would wind up being angry while doing it, therefore leading you to be less happy. If you can convince yourself that the essay is not that bad to begin with and change your emotion into excitement then you would be better off doing it. You would be happier. Can you apply this same idea when it comes to relationships? If you can put forth good emotions when it comes to being in a relationship then the outcome will probably be good. The both of you may grow as a whole if you begin to think positive instead of negative and bring forth good emotions instead of bad ones. In order to do any of this you must know yourself first.
Do you know what makes you happy and what makes you angry? The things you like to do and the things you cannot stand to do? This is all about knowing your core self. In the book Happier by Tal Ben-Shahar, he speaks about the core self. Ben-Shahar breaks down the many things that differ in relationships. He also speaks about core self. Core self basically talks about knowing yourself. You have to know what makes you the person you are today and the things you like to do. You have to know the things that you hate doing or the things that you would not mind trying. In order for anyone else to accept the things you like or the things you do not, you have to know them yourself first. This is all about your core self. How can someone else accept the things you like if you do not even know what they are? This process might take some time because people do not wake up in one day just knowing themselves; they have to try new things first. You never know what you like until you try it. After you know what you like and you do not like then you can work on being in a good relationship. You and your partner can both move on to the knowing and accepting part of the relationship.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought that they would be a good match for you but you never really knew them, they were just someone you thought would look good with you? When they go out with you they tell you that you are beautiful every day and boost your ego? This is called feeling validated. It really just means that they make you feel good or confident; it can be a whole bunch of reasons, you never really know them. Everyone usually goes through this so there is no reason to feel bad or ashamed. There is no way of speeding up the transition from validation to knowing and appreciating one another. This is a slow and steady thing. You just don’t walk up to a person and say “even though I only known you five minutes, I complete know and appreciate you” things don’t usually work out that way. In the happier written by Tal Ben-Shahar he quoted that Schnarch said that to cultivate genuine intimacy the focus of the relationship must shift from the desire to be validated ( seeking approval and praise) to the desire to be known. Schnarch also says in order for a relationship to grow both partners must be willing to be known, that means sharing their “core selves” , their fears , desires , etc. The relationship would mean so much more to you both if you are willing to be known instead of being validated. You both will have a happier relationship if you get over being validated and work on being known. This process takes time but it is all for the better.
Even though people always go through the validation process to transitioning to the knowing and appreciating one other it doesn’t mean you stay at feeling validated. Things will work out better if you just let yourself be known. You both can then start appreciating one another more than you thought you would. This will make your relationship better and you much happier. Yes, feeling validated is a great feeling but an even better is when you have someone that knows and appreciates you; they accept you for who you are. Trust me, I know the feeling and the feeling is wonderful.
Monday, November 1, 2010
Happiness and Relationships
Complaining vs. Fixing vs. Accepting:
Lots of people spend their time with their significant other complaining or trying to “fix” the other person; Rather than accepting who they are and everything they came with. Why go into a relationship where all you do is complain about each other? Complaining doesn’t solve anything. You may very well think it does but no it doesn’t it just makes matters worse. Fixing doesn’t solve anything either, it sometimes make the person feel as though they are not good enough for you. No one ever wants to feel this way. This is when I little thing I call accepting comes in to play. You know that he or she likes to travel and go to different places, sometimes they might even be out late. You have to accept the fact that he or she loves doing that, don’t try and fix it or complain about! Accept it maybe if you try it you might enjoy it yourself.
Lots of people spend their time with their significant other complaining or trying to “fix” the other person; Rather than accepting who they are and everything they came with. Why go into a relationship where all you do is complain about each other? Complaining doesn’t solve anything. You may very well think it does but no it doesn’t it just makes matters worse. Fixing doesn’t solve anything either, it sometimes make the person feel as though they are not good enough for you. No one ever wants to feel this way. This is when I little thing I call accepting comes in to play. You know that he or she likes to travel and go to different places, sometimes they might even be out late. You have to accept the fact that he or she loves doing that, don’t try and fix it or complain about! Accept it maybe if you try it you might enjoy it yourself.
Core Self
Before you go into a relationship you must know yourself. You must know what you like to do, what you don’t like to do and things you wouldn’t mind doing. This is all about figuring out your core self. If you go into a relationship or anything else in your life not knowing who you are you then you might find yourself miserable. You might go into the relationship thinking maybe this won’t be too bad or I can give it a try. You may try it and hate it; you would save yourself less trouble if you know yourself beforehand. If you know or core self and so does your partner then you can at least make an effort to make the relationship work. Both of you will learn to accept each other and then you both will grow as a whole. I learn from experience.
Before you go into a relationship you must know yourself. You must know what you like to do, what you don’t like to do and things you wouldn’t mind doing. This is all about figuring out your core self. If you go into a relationship or anything else in your life not knowing who you are you then you might find yourself miserable. You might go into the relationship thinking maybe this won’t be too bad or I can give it a try. You may try it and hate it; you would save yourself less trouble if you know yourself beforehand. If you know or core self and so does your partner then you can at least make an effort to make the relationship work. Both of you will learn to accept each other and then you both will grow as a whole. I learn from experience.
Real Love vs. "the Ideal"
You always hear on my movies about how love is supposed to be a fairly tail ending and you both live happily ever after. You both never fight and everything is all smiles and no hardships at all. That is what you call “ideal” love in my eyes. Real love is never is all smiles and no hardships. There will be ups and downs but that’s what makes the love grow fonder. You both stick with each other through those times and realize that you both can conquer anything. That’s real love not the love you see on television. Television is just an over exaggeration of the truth and what they want you to believe. Don’t believe everything you see on television.
You always hear on my movies about how love is supposed to be a fairly tail ending and you both live happily ever after. You both never fight and everything is all smiles and no hardships at all. That is what you call “ideal” love in my eyes. Real love is never is all smiles and no hardships. There will be ups and downs but that’s what makes the love grow fonder. You both stick with each other through those times and realize that you both can conquer anything. That’s real love not the love you see on television. Television is just an over exaggeration of the truth and what they want you to believe. Don’t believe everything you see on television.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
My Dream Job
It has always been my pleasure making people happy. I would like no other than to put smiles on as many faces as I can. I would like no other than to save as many lives as I can. My dream job is to become a doctor. I love to help to people and I think that job is perfect for me. If that doesn’t work out then I would want to be an actress and own my own TV show. I like expressing myself and talking so that job would be perfect too. I always had big dreams to do a lot of things but I’m not sure what I would like to do the most. I just want to be happy with whatever I do in life. I haven’t really tried new things lately so I’m not really sure what makes me happy or what I like to do most. There are so many things out there that is makes it hard to choose what I want to do. I just know that whatever I do it just has to involve people.
People always look to money for the root of their happiness. I wouldn’t want to be in a job that I am miserable in just for the money; I would rather be somewhere where I’m happy at. If I’m at a place where I can’t stand being in, how happy do you think I would be? Not that happy. Money doesn’t really mean anything to me. Yes, it plays a big part in this world today but I don’t do things for the money, I do them because of the kindness of my heart , sure I wouldn’t mind getting paid for it but that’s not what I’m looking for in a job. I’m just looking to be happy with whatever I’m doing.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Education
I usually react first and think later before I do anything. Everything I do is based on my emotions. They are the root to everything I do in this life, even the things I do in school. My emotions lead to my talking a lot in and out of class. My outspoken self and my emotions may get out of hand sometimes and that can lead to me being unhappy when I am at school. I have always had the urge to say what is on my mind no matter where I went. I did not care if the teacher was talking, although talking was a good thing sometimes when it was not it affected my grades. Education is the key for success but I find school difficult or boring at times; therefore it leads to me being unhappy while I am trying to achieve an education. I will find ways to channel my emotions and my “big mouth” in school so I can change my views on school and become happy with education.
I have always been the outspoken person out of the bunch. I was the one who always had something to say, I was very opinionated. Even though I was opinionated I was always open minded. If there was someone who wanted to get their point across it was me. I would even debate with teachers if I thought I was right and even if I was wrong, I would still debate just for the fun of it. No one could shut me up if they tried! When it came time to learn I would argue everything that didn’t make sense to me. If it made me feel any kind of way my feelings would be expressed through my words. My emotions always played a part in everything I do or say.
In my “cold” state of mind I think about what I am saying or doing before I actually do or say it. In Loewenstein’s terms a “cold” state of mind is a person’s rational calm state of mind. People who are in this state of mind tend to think before they do anything, they think about the outcomes or consequences first. In my “hot” state of mind I do not care what I say or do. Whatever comes to my mind I will say it without holding anything back. In Loewenstein’s terms a “hot” state of mind is the “heat of the moment” moments, for example those moments in anxiety, fear, courage, drug craving or sexual excitation. People in this state tend to act first before thinking. They usually don’t think about the consequences or the outcomes of what they do. Everything is done in the “heat of the moment”. I am usually in a “hot” state of mind. That is one of my biggest weaknesses in school.
My biggest weakness in school is my outspoken personality. It can get out of hand sometimes and that can be a bad thing. I had no control of it when I was younger but now that I am older I can turn my weakness into my biggest strength. I can make it work for me. I know that I like to talk and I know I can pick out my own classes now so I should at least try to take my biggest weakness and turn it into something positive. I can take an acting class or do something like a radio talk show. If I do one or the other I can get my point across and no one can stop me. It would not affect my grade and I can say whatever I like. This would not only satisfy my wants, it would make me want to go to school more. I would become happier with education.
I never knew how to make school work for me. I always tried to fit into school. It was never a time I went to school because I wanted to learn and I was excited about learning. I always went to school because I was raised by my parents telling me if I didn’t I would be a failure , so school wasn’t really something I enjoyed doing. I dreaded the days in school; I couldn’t talk like I wanted to because all I was told to do was to listen. I couldn’t express myself so I was unhappy in school most of the time. Now that I am in college I can pick classes that I would enjoy. In college not everything is about listening, there are classes here when teachers do not mind if you express yourself. So far the teachers and some of the adults I have met love what students have to say and their opinions. This is a big step from what I experienced in high school.
I now know what makes me happy. I know what I don’t like and what I enjoy. I there are some things in this world that may not work in my favor but education is not one of those things. I can make education work for me from now on. I don’t have to pretend that I enjoy education now, I can actually enjoy it. I can enjoy it by doing the things I like to do. If there is something I don’t like then I don’t have to do it if I don’t want too. I made my out spoken personality fit into education. I can proudly say I actually enjoy being in school now. I made education work for me and you can too!
xoxo,
Cey
I have always been the outspoken person out of the bunch. I was the one who always had something to say, I was very opinionated. Even though I was opinionated I was always open minded. If there was someone who wanted to get their point across it was me. I would even debate with teachers if I thought I was right and even if I was wrong, I would still debate just for the fun of it. No one could shut me up if they tried! When it came time to learn I would argue everything that didn’t make sense to me. If it made me feel any kind of way my feelings would be expressed through my words. My emotions always played a part in everything I do or say.
In my “cold” state of mind I think about what I am saying or doing before I actually do or say it. In Loewenstein’s terms a “cold” state of mind is a person’s rational calm state of mind. People who are in this state of mind tend to think before they do anything, they think about the outcomes or consequences first. In my “hot” state of mind I do not care what I say or do. Whatever comes to my mind I will say it without holding anything back. In Loewenstein’s terms a “hot” state of mind is the “heat of the moment” moments, for example those moments in anxiety, fear, courage, drug craving or sexual excitation. People in this state tend to act first before thinking. They usually don’t think about the consequences or the outcomes of what they do. Everything is done in the “heat of the moment”. I am usually in a “hot” state of mind. That is one of my biggest weaknesses in school.
My biggest weakness in school is my outspoken personality. It can get out of hand sometimes and that can be a bad thing. I had no control of it when I was younger but now that I am older I can turn my weakness into my biggest strength. I can make it work for me. I know that I like to talk and I know I can pick out my own classes now so I should at least try to take my biggest weakness and turn it into something positive. I can take an acting class or do something like a radio talk show. If I do one or the other I can get my point across and no one can stop me. It would not affect my grade and I can say whatever I like. This would not only satisfy my wants, it would make me want to go to school more. I would become happier with education.
I never knew how to make school work for me. I always tried to fit into school. It was never a time I went to school because I wanted to learn and I was excited about learning. I always went to school because I was raised by my parents telling me if I didn’t I would be a failure , so school wasn’t really something I enjoyed doing. I dreaded the days in school; I couldn’t talk like I wanted to because all I was told to do was to listen. I couldn’t express myself so I was unhappy in school most of the time. Now that I am in college I can pick classes that I would enjoy. In college not everything is about listening, there are classes here when teachers do not mind if you express yourself. So far the teachers and some of the adults I have met love what students have to say and their opinions. This is a big step from what I experienced in high school.
I now know what makes me happy. I know what I don’t like and what I enjoy. I there are some things in this world that may not work in my favor but education is not one of those things. I can make education work for me from now on. I don’t have to pretend that I enjoy education now, I can actually enjoy it. I can enjoy it by doing the things I like to do. If there is something I don’t like then I don’t have to do it if I don’t want too. I made my out spoken personality fit into education. I can proudly say I actually enjoy being in school now. I made education work for me and you can too!
xoxo,
Cey
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Become happy with education !
Although education is the key for success, many people that attend school find it difficult or boring; therefore they are unhappy while they are trying to achieve an education. According to Tal Ben-Shahar in the book Happier, he came up with two models that show how students are motivated in school. He states the two models as the “lovemaking” model and the “drowning” model. The love making model is basically when a student enjoys doing what he or she is doing. They take their time and enjoy the learning process and they then benefit from it in both the present and the future. People who are in the “lovemaking” model tend to be happy in school and with education. The drowning model is the complete opposite they don’t enjoy what he or she is doing and they only complete it because of their fear of failure , when they do complete an assignment it’s like a sigh of relief and it may come off as happiness because they finally don’t feel overwhelmed , they are not really happy though. People who are in the “drowning” model tend to be unhappy with education, sometimes it even leads to them dropping out if school. Students should find something they can do or take to make school a better place for them to learn and enjoy education, they would be so much happier.
When I was growing up and even to this day I was raised by the drowning method. Many of my teachers put in my head that I had to do this a certain way or I would be a complete failure. Everything I did and still do is to get that big sigh of relief when it’s all over with. Some things that I do may still give me that overwhelming feeling but when I complete whatever that has to be done I feel good about it. I think it’s more like a feeling of accomplishment than it is happiness. Now that I am older I can change that. I am in college and I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to. I can do the things that make me happy and be happy doing it. I can join a club that I like or take a second language that I find interesting and wouldn’t mind doing it. When you are older nothing is really forced, its either you do it or you don’t.
If you don’t like doing something you must do, try to find ways to make what you’re doing better for you. I know it may be hard at first but it will pay off in the end, don’t just give up. If you like painting and your assignment is about the history of art, try painting a picture first then taking the task at hand. If you paint first and that is something you enjoy doing then when it comes to writing or researching about art, it should be a breeze. You will learn a lot more when you are satisfied or happy before starting or doing your work. I had to learn this the hard way. I realized I enjoyed acting so if I had turned everything into a play or a skit, I would have been so much happier in school. I am older now so that’s what I do to accomplish my work and be happy doing it. You can even join a club to take your mind off of things or try doing something you never did before so you won’t feel so overwhelmed with work, at least you will have something to do that you might enjoy. Education is the key to success but if you’re not happy while trying to achieve one, what’s the point?
Xoxo , Cey
When I was growing up and even to this day I was raised by the drowning method. Many of my teachers put in my head that I had to do this a certain way or I would be a complete failure. Everything I did and still do is to get that big sigh of relief when it’s all over with. Some things that I do may still give me that overwhelming feeling but when I complete whatever that has to be done I feel good about it. I think it’s more like a feeling of accomplishment than it is happiness. Now that I am older I can change that. I am in college and I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to. I can do the things that make me happy and be happy doing it. I can join a club that I like or take a second language that I find interesting and wouldn’t mind doing it. When you are older nothing is really forced, its either you do it or you don’t.
If you don’t like doing something you must do, try to find ways to make what you’re doing better for you. I know it may be hard at first but it will pay off in the end, don’t just give up. If you like painting and your assignment is about the history of art, try painting a picture first then taking the task at hand. If you paint first and that is something you enjoy doing then when it comes to writing or researching about art, it should be a breeze. You will learn a lot more when you are satisfied or happy before starting or doing your work. I had to learn this the hard way. I realized I enjoyed acting so if I had turned everything into a play or a skit, I would have been so much happier in school. I am older now so that’s what I do to accomplish my work and be happy doing it. You can even join a club to take your mind off of things or try doing something you never did before so you won’t feel so overwhelmed with work, at least you will have something to do that you might enjoy. Education is the key to success but if you’re not happy while trying to achieve one, what’s the point?
Xoxo , Cey
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